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do over

Do You Have Any Do Overs?

Everyonedo over has at least one of those times they wished had never happened! It may have been the time you fell down in front of the guy/gal that you really liked or the time you had to give your first speech and you couldn’t even remember you name!

I have a few doozies-the time my slip fell down in front of a roomful of professional men when I was doing a training or the embarrassing (I meant to be meaningful) story I told about my son at his wedding during my toast or the five times I had to sing in front of my college peers because I couldn’t carry a tune in order to pass a music class!

It can take days or months to overcome some Do Overs or just a few minutes. My falling slip was more embarrassing for the men in the room then me. They were all holding their breath not knowing what to do. As soon as I reached down and pulled it up with a “Oh My,” and a laugh they were all able to let out a big sigh and laugh. We went on as if nothing had happened until a break when I was able to say goodbye to that old beloved undergarment!

The toast took weeks to get over. I was finally relieved when a month after the wedding my son said, “Mom we decided to cut that part of the video out. I hope you are okay about it.” Not only was I okay, I was finally able to relax with the realization my granddaughters would never hear my blunder!

The music incident was easy. The professor finally gave me a passing grade for effort. I just never took another music class!!

Since we all have them and since we are likely to have future ones…Here are three hints of how to best handle a Do Over!!!

1. If at all possible-laugh at and with yourself. It happens to everyone. Allowing others to share in the moment with you is really healing and helpful. If you can invite them to laugh with you by making a joke about the event they will usually appreciate the moment. We all make mistakes and people feel better about themselves when they can see how you model this. It is only one incident. Most people do not even remember the details like you do. (I suspect the men have all forgotten that slip event, but I never will!)

2. Forgive Youself and Take Responsibility. Acknowledge that you made a mistake or underestimated yourself. Some do overs happen because we are not prepared or take on too much.  Ask yourself if there was anything you could learn from the event so you can avoid it in the future. Think about how you would treat another person and then do that for yourself. You better believe that I will prepare better for any public speaking event I am doing in the future!

3. Learn from it! Every experience has a lesson in it. You may have to search for the good but do your best to decide what you are supposed to learn about yourself. Maybe you are stronger than you realize, maybe you shouldn’t do something you forced yourself to do, maybe you need to slow down, take deeper breaths, or trust yourself more.

Everything we do in life give us a chance for lots of lessons! Figuring out how to enjoy each one is a real gift!!!

(You can use EFT to release any bad memory. Call me if you want help!!)